It’s curious that self-depreciation often keeps us from delivering our strengths, while it seems as though it’s opposite does the same thing. Even more curious, self-depreciation and destructive ego may just be different manifestations of the same inferiority thoughts.
What is a destructive ego? Destructive Ego is synonymous with narcissism, inflated self-importance, vanity and conceit. It’s a self-focused belief that the team depends on you, and solely on you. A destructive ego might be named by the term “a self-made” man especially if it is self-referenced. There is no such thing as a “self-made” man in either my theology or my sociology. From a faith perspective, God created us, and every single talent is on loan from Him. From a sociological or a business perspective, no one succeeds by them selves. Even a solo business depends on suppliers, shippers, and service support of some kind. Supposed solo athletes have sponsors, caddies, and fans who pay to see them play. Whatever success you have attained, you’ve had some support. I love the way Leadership author John Maxwell put’s it:
“If you see a turtle on a fence post, chances are he had help!”
A destructive ego can make demands that it does all the “important” work. A destructive ego suggests that only it’s piece or part is the most important. A destructive ego has trouble recognizing the strengths in others or at least minimizes them. One look at the compensation structure in much of corporate America suggests that a destructive ego is in charge in many of our largest companies. What happened to the Lee Iacocca’s that were willing to work for $1.00 a year until the company they ran was out of debt and making a profit? Progressive organizations like Ben & Jerry’s and Whole Foods voluntarily limit top compensation as a % or specific multiple of bottom compensation though both have had to make adjustments after outsiders started poaching their management team. In one study done in 2005, the average corporate CEO was making 411 times the salary of the lowest worker.
In some individuals this manifests itself in a reluctance to delegate tasks that better fit someone else. In other individuals it manifests as a reluctance to partner. At the end of the day, the destructive ego gets robbed of the opportunity to focus on what they do best because they must do it all. And they rob the potential employee or partner as well.
Before we hammer to hard on the destructive ego, let’s make a few balancing points. Destructive ego is not the same thing as a healthy self-assurance identified by Gallup studies as a critical talent or when developed, a wonderful strength. Self-Assurance is critical for people who start businesses and knock and doors to sell things. These people are our talented entrepreneurs who drive our economy. Those with self-assurance build great teams and have the ability to step back and let others do what they are great at.
Your Moment of Truth:
A healthy ego shares the best chores, the cash, and the credit!
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